You fight crime after your plants give you superpowers

[Camzilla]

Prompt:
You walk through your garden and each plant you touch gives you a superpower. You then fight crime with these random super powers.

[Camzilla]

It had been like this for a couple of weeks. The news had reported an odd sun flare and ever since then I’d felt a little odd after doing my daily gardening. I had been picking tomatoes when I went to pull off a tomato that might not have been all the way ripe and I accidentally ripped the whole plant out. I ripped out three tomato plants before I realized touching the tomatoes gave me super human strength.

Each day I tended my tomatoes and each time I gained super human strength. I also ripped out more tomato plants. I guess I didn’t know my own strength? After the fourth time I went to Lowe’s to buy replacement plants. With a flat cart full of them, I walked through the store and heard someone call for help. One of the workers had tipped over their large ladder and were stuck under it. I used my strength to get them out.

After paying for my plants I sat in my in wonder. I could do some good with this! Was it just tomatoes? Did all the plants in my garden give super powers? I drove home as fast as I could within the constraints of the law and rolled through a few stop signs. I had dumped the plants in the shed and planted myself in the middle of my garden.

I stared at the different beds: okra, jalapeño peppers, radishes, cantaloupes. I’m an avid gardener, both fruits, vegetables and herbs as well as flowers. I had so much to choose from that I didn’t know where to start.

I picked a jalapeño pepper and nothing changed. Interesting. Then I tasted it. The air. It tasted so gross. I made a mental note to never touch a jalapeño ever again.

I pinched okra off its stem and my vision instantly sharpened. I could see everything clearly despite distance. My heart was pounding and I felt high off the adrenaline. I dropped the okra to the ground and tore up a carrot. I could hear almost everything. My heart was pounding in my ears. It was so loud I almost could hear anything else.

All the noises around me were sharpened. A car a couple miles away backfired and my heart leaped like I was on the deadly end of a shotgun blast. I dropped the carrot and put my hands over my ears. It helped, but not enough.

I over did it. Why did I have to pick up all those things? I scoured my living room and was so relieved when I found ear plugs. I sighed as everything I had been hearing all became really muffled. Although it wouldn’t be enough to sleep with, I did have some headphones that would block everything else out.

Sleeping that night was interesting. Even though I had ear plugs in and head phones on, I was still getting sound in my ears. Eventually, though, I managed to pass out. When I awoke I was blissfully back to my ordinary self.

Now, I couldn’t help but wonder if I could actually do more with all of this. Super strength with some super sight? Sounds like a super hero to me! I lived in a large city so I knew there was crime. Maybe if I had the right combo I’d be able to help out, right?

That’s how I spent the next couple of weeks. Every morning I’d pick one tomato and one piece of okra. I could see far into the distance and I was super strong. I was able to run faster too due to stronger legs. I dressed in an old Halloween mask of Richard Nixon, a tank top and jeans. It was an odd outfit but I had to protect my identity. I didn’t have an actual super hero costume. Though the Richard Nixon mask looked a little off considering I had a large bust.

One morning I had my mask pulled up just above my face ready to get going for the day. My sunflowers were beginning to bloom and the bees were happy. Looking at my sunflowers though, something wasn’t right. They were all bending dangerously, like they were weighed down by something. Their blooms weren’t large enough to cause this issue so I had to investigate.

The sunflowers swayed heavily in a non-existent wind. They would bend and then whip back up after a few moments, as if an invisible force were pulling them down and slingshotting them back up. A loud buzzing was emanating from them. I hadn’t grabbed any carrots. Why were the bees so loud?

I had my answer soon enough.

Almost as large as a football, a bee came barreling out from between the stocks of sunflowers.

I screamed.

I screamed like my life depended on it. Screw superpowers.

I bolted for the house, locked the doors and checked all the windows.

I guess I would need to call pest control. I wonder if they charge extra for football bees.

Sigh.